What an abysmal offensive performance by Jacksonville on Thursday night. At one point in the third quarter, Maurice Jones-Drew had 20-plus more total yards than the Jaguars had net as a team…Let's just hope this season is a lesson to the NFL when it comes to picking primetime games. Using Vegas over/unders would be an obvious solution…After recording a 137.3 QB rating in a near flawless performance last week, Matt Ryan has a 17:4 TD:INT ratio over the past seven games, taking just eight sacks over that span. He continues to play better at home, but he's hiked his YPA up, and while the Falcons are rightfully underdogs Monday night, the over/under is 52.5, so it should be a high-scoring affair that requires a lot of passes from Ryan. Meanwhile, Roddy White has 38 catches for 537 yards and five touchdowns over the past five games, as there isn't a hotter receiver in the league.
FedEx guy throwing and breaking a computer monitor.
Down 28-0 at halftime last week to the Cowboys, it sure appears like the Bucs have quit on this season…LeGarrette Blount has got 21 total yards or fewer in two of the past three games, as he's really suffered from Tampa Bay's downfall, as few backs rely more on game situations since he's removed from all passing downs. He's also fumbled four times (losing three) over the past four contests and is tied among all running backs with the most penalties committed in 2011. He remains a tackle-breaking machine in the open field, but Blount must improve his overall game to enter the fantasy elite…Mike Williams was held without a catch in Week 15, coming up small during a big fantasy time. He's yet to reach 100 yards in a game this season and has scored just three touchdowns after reaching the end zone 11 times as a rookie last year. Williams' eight dropped passes are tied for the eighth-most among wide receivers, and he's also committed a whopping six penalties on the year. He's certainly been hurt by Josh Freeman's regression in 2011, but Williams has struggled to gain separation, and he's a risky fantasy start in Week 16, even against a Carolina defense that has allowed an NFL-high 8.3 YPA this season.
Man eats cocaine from brother's butt, dies.
At just 6.5 points, I found the Texans line to be fishy last week (that means it would have been essentially a pick 'em if the game was in Carolina). After all, Houston entered 10-3 fighting for the AFC's top seed, whereas the Panthers came in 4-9 with possibly the NFL's worst defense. The latter has exciting skill position players, while the former was hit hard by injuries, but the spread nevertheless seemed curious. So naturally, the Panthers entered halftime with a 21-0 lead (and yes, I lost a teaser because of this)…T.J. Yates was pretty awful Sunday. He's been a serviceable replacement for the most part, but don't let it fool you, Houston's Super Bowl hopes ended with Matt Schaub's injury.
African Bull Frog ant crusher (stay till the end).
Reggie Bush was given 25 carries in a game Sunday for the first time in his career, and the result was 203 rushing yards (8.1 YPC). He's now ran for at least 100 yards in three straight games and has six touchdowns over his past seven contests. Despite not getting 15 rushing attempts in a game until Week 8 this season, Bush is on pace to finish with 1,421 yards from scrimmage. Pro Football Focus rates Bush as the second worst blocker among all running backs in the league this year, but he's clearly improved greatly as a runner inside the tackles, and who would have thought he'd excel by getting away from turf and onto grass. I must say I didn't see this coming…Speaking of running back performances from the dead, C.J. Spiller totaled 164 yards on just 22 touches in Week 15, including nine receptions. He also added two touchdowns, doubling his season total in the process. He's up to 5.0 YPC on the year and suddenly looks like an excellent start in PPR leagues as the team's new feature back. Things will get clouded next year once Fred Jackson returns to Buffalo's backfield, but Spiller has got 3.0 YPC after contact this season, which is tied for eighth-best among running backs. Good thing I dropped him earlier this year in my home league.
This runaway cart did quite a bit of damage.
I'm not saying the Titans' decision to start Matt Hasselbeck cost them a chance at making the playoffs, but it certainly didn't help. Hasselbeck has produced one touchdown over his past five games. Jake Locker has produced five touchdowns over his past three games, all in relief duty…Funny the NFL's lone winless team won while the league's only undefeated team lost Sunday…Donald Brown ran for a career-high 161 yards last week, thanks largely to a sick 80-yard touchdown run in the final minutes of the fourth quarter. The play highlighted Brown's breakaway speed, as he got to the corner and never looked back. Brown entered the year averaging just 3.8 YPC over the first two seasons of his career, but he's all the way up to 5.1 in 2011. His 3.2 YPC after contact is tied for fourth among all backs in football. Still just 24 years old, Brown might have quietly emerged as Indy's feature back of the future in an otherwise lost year for the franchise…When the Colts went up 3-0, it was the first time they led in nine games (tying an NFL record).
This own goal is pretty legit.
Kellen Clemens' 95.7 QB rating was the best he's posted in a game during his career, which isn't bad considering he was facing a solid defense and just signed with the Rams last week. Still, he's facing a tough task in Pittsburgh this week facing an angry Steelers defense…A.J. Green showed a lot of heart playing through a painful shoulder injury…As someone who started the Bengals defense, it was painful to watch them turn to prevent and allow a 70-yard TD drive in the final two minutes of Sunday's game.
This person freaks out whenever he sees an El Camino. He must hate the new Black Keys album.
As someone who was facing the Seahawks' D this week, it wouldn't be an unfair statement to call Caleb Hanie my least favorite human being right now (this gives a little bit of insight into my perspective in life). While most teams (like the Rams) gain garbage yards and points against prevent defenses down big late in games, Hanie was preoccupied taking sacks and throwing interceptions, including his second pick-six of the game. Hanie has now thrown three interceptions during three of his four games played this year. I'm beginning to think he's a downgrade from Jay Cutler…Marshawn Lynch has now scored in 10 straight contests, totaling 12 over that span. It's the unstoppable force versus the immovable object this week, as the 49ers continue to vie to be the only team in NFL history to not allow a single rushing score in a season.
Here's a 59-year-old winning a truck with a ridiculous hockey shot.
Pretty crazy that Percy Harvin went back to disappearing once Adrian Peterson returned to the lineup. I can't figure out that correlation (causation?)…Drew Brees now has a 16:0 TD:INT ratio over the past five games.
Green Bay hadn't trailed during the fourth quarter of a game since December 10, 2010 before Sunday's loss…With no Greg Jennings, it was a massive disappointment (and surprise) to see Jordy Nelson, James Jones and Donald Driver total six catches for 53 yards…How bad must Todd Haley feel right about now?
Here's a funny video of kids reacting to their parents giving terrible Christmas gifts (be sure to stay till the end).
Not only did Hakeem Nicks drop a wide open sure to be 60-yard touchdown that hit him in the face mask, he had another ball slip through his hands in the end zone and yet another TD catch called back on a holding penalty. Needless to say, it was a frustrating game to watch as a fantasy owner. Nicks will have a tough time redeeming himself in the fantasy Super Bowl with a matchup against Darrelle Revis this week…So if the Giants beat the Jets on Sunday, the afternoon game between the Eagles and Cowboys becomes totally meaningless. That's at least something to keep in mind, although I probably wouldn't change any lineup decisions as a result, with the possible exception of Felix Jones being less likely to play.
Extreme high-lining.
It's been an up-and-down year for Darrius Heyward-Bey, who averaged 96.3 receiving yards over a four-game stretch from Weeks 4-7, only to average just 21.6 receiving yards over the next five contests. He mysteriously disappeared from the game plan coming off the team's Week 8 bye and clearly struggled to develop a rapport with new quarterback Carson Palmer. DHB also got banged up physically. With the rest of Oakland's receiving corps ravaged by injuries, and Heyward-Bey back to health, the third-year wideout has racked up 13 catches for 233 yards over the past two contests, and he's scored twice over the past three games. Heyward-Bey has been targeted 36 times over the past month, so he's firmly back on the fantasy radar…What a performance by Matthew Stafford and Calvin Johnson. As a Stafford owner who needed big points in the afternoon games, that 98-yard TD drive at the end was a beautiful thing to watch, nearly bringing tears to my eyes…Hue Jackson not going for two with the score 26-14 with 7:47 has now moved into first place as the single dumbest coaching decision of the year (this is not a hindsight thing, I was going absolutely crazy at the time). He really thought it was more likely Detroit would score three more times with that little time left than two touchdowns? It really was poetic justice that Oakland ended up losing by the one point.
It's entirely possible Seneca Wallace is an upgrade over Colt McCoy. Wallace now has a 30:16 TD:INT ratio over his career…Almost every single one of Beanie Wells' 10 touchdowns this season have come on runs to the left…The Cardinals are somehow 6-1 over their past seven games. Both they and the Seahawks have shown real improvement over the second half of the season.
I like how Vince Young finished Sunday's blowout victory 0-for-0 with three sacks…LeSean McCoy is now up to 20 touchdowns on the year. He'll have a strong case to be the No. 1 overall player taken at fantasy drafts in 2012…With the Jets' season on the line, the battle in the Meadowlands on Sunday should be a good one.
This TV channel dedicated to watching rotisserie chicken looks fascinating.
The Broncos ran for 167 yards in the first quarter last week, but what a terrific performance by Tom Brady. Tim Tebow played well and continues to improve as a passer, but it's tough to overcome three lost fumbles while facing New England's offense…Aaron Hernandez caught nine balls on 11 targets for 129 yards and a score Sunday. Brady missed him while wide open that would have resulted in a long touchdown, he had another play in the end zone that could have easily been ruled a catch (still not sure why Bill Belichick didn't even challenge it), and he was tackled inside the one-yard line as well, so Hernandez could have had a truly monstrous day. He's been overshadowed by teammate Rob Gronkowski, but Hernandez has been playing hobbled and with a knee brace for most of the season, yet is still on pace to finish with 844 receiving yards over 14 games played. He's also been targeted 21 times inside the red zone, and there's no reason to think two tight ends can't be plenty productive in New England's passing attack, as he's typically split wide anyway. Hernandez leads all tight ends with 21 broken tackles this season. To put that in perspective, no other tight end in the NFL has broken more than 10 this year. I'll have him ranked third on my TE board entering 2012.
Presenting the 2011 Mug Shots of the Year.
It was nice to see Ryan Mathews get some goal-line carries, and he executed them well, getting to the outside with speed and looking a whole lot like LaDainian Tomlinson later jumping over the pile from three yards out. He entered the game with the worst career fumble/carry rate among all running backs in football, and he put another on the carpet Sunday night, but only health can prevent him from being a top-15 fantasy pick next year…Anquan Boldin will soon have surgery to repair a slight tear in his meniscus and is expected to be sidelined for the next two weeks, which means he should be back for the playoffs, but his regular season is finished. Boldin averaged more yards per game during his second year in Baltimore (63.4) this season than his first (52.3), but his touchdowns dropped from seven to three. He'll be 32 years old entering 2012 and has taken a lot of hits throughout his career, so his fantasy stock continues to fall.
Metta World Peace is just as insane as Ron Artest.
It's funny how people questioned whether Ben Roethlisberger was going to play Monday night, although to be fair, he was clearly hobbled, and at this point, it makes some sense for him to rest this week in a game they are heavily favored at home versus the Rams (it's also an extremely short turnaround)…I was at Monday night's game, and while the atmosphere was definitely electric, man do Steeler fans travel well. There were quite a few terrible towels…We started the tailgate early, which was a lot of fun, but then someone from our crew ultimately decided to do this. Two power outages, a bomb threat and a guy from our tailgate party getting arrested. Good times!